He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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