My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
