I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
