She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
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