It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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