and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Randomize
