My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
