For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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