ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
