Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
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