My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Randomize
