I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
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