i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
