I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
If I die, sorry about rent.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
