I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize
