Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
You need Xanax blowdarts
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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