I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I feel great
I just peed on a car
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
