i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize
