I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
