Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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