I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Also, beer. Big fan.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
