is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
