im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
