Fine. I'll sleep in my office
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Every concussion has its silver lining
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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