I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
