Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Randomize
