I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
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