It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
