Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
My vagina is very pro this idea
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize
