I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
do herpes really smell.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
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