So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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