So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
There r osticjed everywhere
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
