quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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