The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
