I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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