so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize