These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
