I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Randomize
