i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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