I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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