Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
