Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
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