How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
