hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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