Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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