butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Randomize
