Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize
