I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
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