and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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