id be glad to
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Randomize
